Moment of Zen – College Coaches from Tom Zenner on Vimeo.
I’ve seen the trailer for Adam Sandler’s new movie. It looks like it will truly suck like most of his last few flicks have. He’s become quite consistent, but if Sandler ever gets even more un-inspired and mails in a script for the sequel of Anger Management, may I suggest he get his inspiration from college football coaches. There are some angry dudes out there roaming the sidelines.
In fact some are so incensed, ticked off and out of control, that they look like their heads will simultaneously explode as their veins pop like water balloons. Hey coaches—got a little message for you—take one deep breath—2 chill pills—and stop acting like idiots!
Seriously—You are embarrassing yourself, your school, your team, your alumni, your cardiologist, your band, your hair dresser and your family —-and did I mention you look like unstable, out-of-touch, abusive, psychotic, control freaks? Well, you do.
While some coaches spend Saturday’s acting like complete fools on the sidelines, there are others that save their brain locks until the press conference. Yes, I’m talking about you Mike Gundy, and that other circus clown from the small school in Tennessee that was talking about his cats and dogs earlier this year. (Google it. You’ll be embarrassed for his family, I guarantee you.)
I think it’s important to mention the coaches that think it’s okay to embarrass their players in front of millions of people on a semi-regular basis. That would be Brian Kelley of Notre Dame, Will Muschchamp of Florida, Mike Stoopes- formerly of Arizona and the gum-chomping, vein bulging, ulcer developing, Bo Pellini of Nebraska.
I have to ask you a question coaches; were you aware your games were televised when you signed your contracts? Oh, and while you expect perfection out of your players apparently, may I suggest you screaming dictators take a good look in the mirror and realize what you’re doing might not be working!
I know football is tough and discipline is important. I played in college for 2 future NFL head coaches, (Hue Jackson of the Raiders and Jon Gruden) one who won a Super Bowl, so I get it. I really do.
But times have changed you dinosaurs. Encouragement goes further than verbal beat downs and humiliation. So coaches, the next time a player misses a tackle runs the wrong route or fumbles, just think happy thoughts. Like unicorns jumping over rainbows or something. Although, I feel bad for that poor one-horned horse if it were to screw up.